Last spring, I watched a gorgeous cooper’s hawk swoop into our yard and perch in stillness on the fence pole at the back. At the feeder above, the rowdy twittering of little sparrows, wrens and finches was constant. All the birds were sporting their mating colors: the house finches in their reds and the gold finches their brilliant yellows. Then, silence. I looked up, only to see the cooper’s hawk tearing across the sky with a bright yellow package in his talons.
Oh! sigh. WTF! And all the feels: sad, mad and guilt, too: maybe I should take the feeder down?
After a bit, I got it: the hawk’s got to eat too. I can help the little birds stay healthy and propagate with my feeders, and the hawks will benefit too.
This is one of those lessons I have had to learn again and again: walk in the shoes of another. Especially someone (or thing) that annoys you. Putting myself in the shoes (or amazing talons!) of the hawk, I can feel his drive to hunt, kill and eat small birds and mammals. Unlike me, who can choose a vegetarian lifestyle, the hawk cannot. It is his way. And, “my” adorable birds hovering around the feeder, may indeed become his lunch.
Making peace with this timeless cycle of life helps me put myself in others’ shoes too. Whether it’s the anti-vaccinators (fearing their safety or independence), the driver who cut me off (must be in a big hurry) or my dear friend who is always late (all the reasons!), allowing the tense energy of anger and fear to dissipate is a gift. Each time I am able to see the other’s side of things, I feel peaceful, and hopeful too.
May we all find the patience and sensitivity to walk in one another’s shoes.